I am a daughter. I am a wife. I am a mother. But through it all, I have been and always will be, a woman.

Dear God:

Thank You.  You know my husband’s doctor sent him for an upper GI scope.  You know he was quite insistent that it be done very soon.  I’m sure You also know that I took all of that in stride.  After all, what could really be wrong?

Until last night.  Last night, I went to bed and tried to sleep.  Suddenly, I wondered, WHY was the doctor so insistent he have this done RIGHT NOW?  WHAT was he REALLY worried about?

Then I started thinking.  That’s always dangerous, You know that.  I started thinking about tumors, and cancer.  I started thinking about what would happen to me and the kids.  Yes, he has life insurance to provide for us financially.  But what we do without HIM?  I didn’t like that train of thought at all.  I saw my boys fatherless.  I saw me a widow.

I know You would have taken care of him, and us, but still.

And in all of my fears and worries, I did not turn to You for comfort.  I’m sorry.

I did turn to You and beg You for my husband’s life.  I begged that he be okay.  I begged as I lay there in bed next to my husband in absolute terror.  I begged.  And of that I am NOT ashamed.

Thank You for letting me keep him.  Thank You for letting this be a hiatal hernia.  I know that isn’t the best news, but it is nowhere close to the worst news.  It’s not even close to all of my waking nightmares last night that kept me from sleeping.  Thank You.  He is one of my three greatest gifts from You and I don’t want to lose him.  Not yet.  Not ever, but I know that isn’t possible.  So Thank You.

Thank You for granting my prayers.

Amen,

Me.

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www.awriterweavesatale.com/

Author, and Editor of Literary and Arts Magazine, The Woven Tale Press

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